Mind the gap.

26 February 2004

One of those mornings when I wake up and the sun is blinding me with its radiance, and I look outside the window and all I see is blue. Bright bright blue skies. Not a single cloud on the horizon, just bright blue and sunlight surrounding me... and I can't help but think how perfect it is.

How otherworldly it is.

I've always had that feeling on a morning like this morning... there's something in the air, something that tingles my senses and makes my heart ache. Even though it's not particularly warm, I don't care. It's too beautiful to care about that.

But it never lasts... the skies lie to me, telling me that things can be ethereally beautiful in my own world and that I don't have to wander into the depths of my mind to experience a Fantasy world, but then it all goes awry. Blue skies lie.

A last deep breath of the clear air, then into the suffocating, repressive school.

And everything goes downhill.

In homeroom, it's all crap crap crap YELL YELL YELL you guys SUCK you are lazy ARSES and you DON'T DESERVE ANYTHING from Shu & Stou.

I forgot to type my English paper that I'd previously forgotten to WRITE over the vacation.

I play a game with my family, I joke with my brother about him not knowing what a 'catamaran' or a 'feather boa' is, and my dad chastises me.

And I get to the point where I don't really care.

If I try to defend myself or any of us, Shu and Stou block their ears and only hear me trying to get out of trouble. They will not listen.

I do not like knowing that people are angry with me, especially when the basis of their anger is very, very weak.

But I get to the point where I do not care any more.

You think something's wrong with me, Mrs. Shuster? Well, don't ask Ed about it behind my back. Ask me if you really care, which I somehow doubt.

Not that I'd tell you. And even if I did, you wouldn't understand me. We live on opposite planes of existence, opposite poles, merely crossing paths for a short time in this tangible world, but other than that, there is nothing.

Nothing.

Blue Skies Lie stopped here at 10:25 p.m.

last stop | next stop